Kids say the darnest things... or the cutest things!

Its been a while since I have posted, been busy and a little pre-occupied!
But the best way to get back into the writing mode is to just do it and humor makes it easier!
So Kids Say the darnest things edition

Story number 1:
Little Lady and Miss Chatterbox are currently learning Hindi and with my mom in town, the immersion with the language has been easier for sure.
A lazy Sunday Morning, Little Lady is chatting with her cousin in India and conversion in Hindi.
---Conversation in Hindi---
Cousin from India: Appka Favorite color kya hain?
Little Lady: Mera sabse acha rang 'Sunehra' hain!
-----End of Conversation----

We all here and in India burst out laughing, no one uses the word 'Sunehra' any more. And my mom was super proud: 'My work here of making them puritan's of the language is done!

Story number 2:
Now, Chicago is a windy city, and yes the winters get really cold. But we have been in this city for about a decade and kind of have gotten used to it.

A morning drive:
Little Lady: Mummy, its only 35 F today, its so warm today!
Me: Yes, but slightly chilly still, so you need your jackets/
Little Lady: It's Chicago, so 35F is warm!

I guess she has learned to find the silver lining already!

As I navigate the waters of being a mother of a 10 year old and 5 year old, life is always fun, sometimes funny and a lot of times I do have a Deer in Headlight moment!
The one thing that helps me keep sane (sort of) is finding this silver lining in life!

Find your world through the rose tinted glasses, it makes you smile.

With kids, funny things happen, ALL THE TIME.

You just have to stop and smell the flowers as they say.

But sometimes things happen that you just laugh your socks off... and this was one of those:
Now I qualify this as 'Kids say the darnest things' though not word was said.

A few weekends ago, one afternoon we were chilling with very dear friends of ours. And they have the most friendly and cute dog.... lets call him 'Roomba'. Why? Since if there is a piece of food on floor he eats it away! I always say, they never need a vacuum.

So, my friend was teaching Miss Chatterbox a few tricks for Roomba, the dog, like Sit, Sleep and then offer a treat.
The story goes like this.

My friend holds out the treat and says.
' Roomba, Sleep, Roomba, put your head down, Roomba stop wagging the tail'
The adorable dog, Roomba is, he does all three and then happily gets his treat.

My chatterbox (7 years old)follows the cue and repeats the same :
' Roomba, Sleep, Roomba, put your head down, Roomba stop wagging the tail'
The adorable dog, Roomba is, he does all three and then happily gets his treat.

Everyone is happy and cheering the dog, Roomba and the girls.

My friend then asks Little Lady (who just turned two), Do you want to try?
And the little lady does the following:
'She Sleeps,She puts her head down, and she stops moving'

So now, the two year old is cutely lying on the floor and we are in splits and laughing hysterically.
Miss Chatterbox goes and says, 'Little Lady deserved a treat!' and feeds her a cheerio

I assure you, this will be a memory etched in all our minds for a long time to come. I swear, I wish we were making a video, it completely would have made it to AFV!

I have a bead up my nose: She did what!!!

Another one of the "Kids say the darnest things' edition with our usual suspect: Little Lady!

Scene: 5:45 am, weekday morning, our 11th Wedding Anniversary!

Mommy hears Little Lady walk slowly in her room

Mommy lovingly says: Come on in my bed and snuggle in!! 💗

Little Lady whispers: Mommy I can't, I had a Mishap (Implying pee'd in her bed) 😓

Mommy consoled groggily: It's okay honey, head to the rest room, I will help you 😒

(She has been potty trained fro a long time, so mishap is not usual, no
big deal, it happens)

Little Lady whispers: Mommy, I also have a bead in my nose 😔

Mommy sprints up from bed and says'calmly': what? 😡

Little Lady whispers: Mommy, I have a bead in my nose  😔
(She keeps a brave face and looking pitiful)

Mommy has a mini freak out and says'calmly': How? 😡

Little Lady whispers: I put it there 😔

Mommy quickly wakes up husband snoring peacefully: YOUR little angel has put a bead in her nose. WAKE UP  😠

Mommy looks up Little Lady's nose with a phone torch: "Hell, it is a BEAD' 😠

Daddy wakes up, calls the doctors office and finds out process of 'almost 4 year old with a bead up her nose'
Mommy picks up the soiled Little Lady and rushes to bathroom and makes her sit down 'withoug getting angry, since last thing momy wanted is to upset Little Lady'
Big Sister aka Chatterbox wakes up with the commotion and comes to the bathroom 'What's going on'

Mommy still speaking calmly: Little Lady has a bead up her nose. 😠

Big Sister bursts out laughing is asuper confused but laughs a lot! 😈
Little Lady is now parked on the bathroom sink and smiling and 'checking herself' out in mirror😇

Mommy 'googles' and finds out that before ER, try the following
1. Have the child blow her nose: Okay that I can do
2. Use a 'nose bulb' and 'vacuum it out': Hmm, how hard can that be
3. Use tweezers to pull it out: Hell no, I am NOT doing that!

So mommy barks these instructions at Daddy and starts looking for the 'nose bulb' which is used for kids under 1 year!!
Mommy is getting angrier and angrier, seriously: bead up her nose! what the hell was she thinking!

In ONE minute, there is a loud burst of laughter from the bathroom and mommy rushes in 😠

Daddy while demonstrating 'how to blow the nose' has 'nosy' all over him and kids are laughing a lot!!!!
Mommy is really  ANGRY now and she stomps off to look for the 'bloody nose bulb' 😠

In ONE minute again, there is loud cheering from the bathroom and mommy rushes in

Little Lady did manage to blow the bead out of her nose!
Daddy and big sister are searching for bead on floor to double check
Little Lady is laughing and smiling since 'she did it'

Mommy is calm outside: "Phew" 😶
and ANGRY WITHIN 😠
In all these past '8+3' years of parenting, I HAVE NEVER SEEN MY CHILD WITH A BEAD UP HER NOSE, WHAT THE HELL! 😠


Morning continued as 'normal', kids were bathed, fed and ready for school by 8! 🙆
Mommy was left bewildered 🙍
Daddy was left feeling like a champion 'Since he helped the bead out her nose' 🙋

Well Happy 11th Anniversary to US! 😂

Life is full of surprises, some good, some bad! You  see the Silver Line and Smile. 

We are blessed to have these kids who can keep calm even when they messed up, a support system which can find things funny even when an almost 4 year announces at 5:45 am

 'I have a Bead Up my nose'

We did manage a Date Night for our Anniversary!

Kids say the darnest things...

If there was a race between my two girls of who spoke the 'most outrageous' things... well in my opinion, the Little Lady will be first followed by a close finish by the Miss Chatterbox.

Yes you read that right: the 4 year old will win for the most ridiculous things said instead of the 9 year old! Uff!

Case in Point

Story 1:  'Cow Dog'

Scene: While driving to school

Little Lady: Mummy look there is a cow dog

Mummy looking around on the streets of downtown Chicago.... and a Cow, hell no, Dog yes

Mummy: I cant see it baby.. oh wait a minute, the black and white spotted dog: that's a Dalmatian

Little Lady: Yes I know its a Dalmatian, but from today it will be a 'Cow Dog'

Mummy: Why?

Little Lady: Well only cows have black and white spots but this is a dog, hence 'Cow Dog'

No reasoning can trump this 4 year old

Story 2: 'I know how this will end'

Scene: In a afternoon 'scolding' the Miss Chatterbox for something

Mummy: I am shocked and disappointed in you

Miss Chatterbox: I know this will end, you will now yell at me, I will cry, you will take something away, I will cry, We will hug and make up

Mummy: Ouch....

In my mind: I better change my 'scolding play book' and get something more effective

Story 3: 'Dress and leggings'

Scene: The older one is home due to an injury and has some friends visiting to check in on her, I take a quick trip out of the house to pick up the little one from school and tell her on way back: We have a surprise at home for you. On entering the house peeps in the living room and sees the friends and squeals with happiness

Little Lady: oooh, yay. Let me run inside and change into my dress and leggings

Mummy: Really laughing loudly: They want to just see you.

Little Lady: noooo, i want them to see me in my dress and leggings!

10 minutes later, the little lady enter with aplomb in her dress and leggings: My friend said correctly: This one is going to be an interesting one to raise.

I agree and run for the hills....

Tradition.. just because

At the doctor's for the kids annual exams, I have a tradition, the girls dress up in the 'Paper Dresses' and I snap pictures of them.
Since 2014, so I can call it an annual tradition right?

Look at those faces, aren't they adorable. The nurse walks in just as I was coercing them to 'smile naturally' for this amazing tradition and the nurse chuckles and asks- Why?
I respond, I love the story of 'The Paper Bag Princess' and ever since I read that story, I do this... It's like an ode to the book written in 1981. They did know the reality even then!!
If you have not read it, please do.

What is a silly tradition that you have in your family? just because!

On a side note, Here is my Little Lady's new installment on 'Kids Say the Darnest Things'
Evening time, while the kids sip on their milk and argue about the silliest thing, this conversation ensues

Little Lady: " Did didi (Miss Chatterbox) grow up in your tummy?"
Me, the smart mom: "Yes honey, she did"
Little Lady: " Did I grow up in your tummy?"
Me, the smart mom: "Yes honey, you did too"
Little Lady: "Oh that means we both met each other in your tummy and have been friends since
Me, the smart mom: "Uh well, not exactly since you both were in my tummy 5 years apart"
Little Lady: "But we both were in your tummy and I know her since then! I remember!!. We used to fight even then"
Me, the confused mom: "uh- okay"

And then as always, laughter ensues!! "She remembers the fighting!! Is this her justification, man... I am creeped out. I think.

Kids say the darnest things

I am starting this new label today. With a chatter box around, it was only a matter of time. And I am really hoping as V is growing up REALLY fast, I want to capture this sweet innocence. And yes at some point, hold these stories as ransom for her to oblige!

Point 1:
This weekend, Little Big V, was not in the best of health. It started with a headache and resulted in a full fever, chills etc. Yup, apparantly 5 year olds do get head aches. I didnt know. The three chicas of the house went on a trip to Target for some errands and this is what happened in Aisle 9
Miss V:" I really need to get some coffee for this headache. "

Point 2: We picked up the girls V & her friend M from school yesterday. With two five year olds, its generally random chit chat about this and that. Sumit had played the songs from the movie 'Besharam' for the girls to enjoy
M: What does 'Besharam' mean?
V: It means to not be shy. So I will 'Besharam' all the time.
M: Oh ok, I will tell my mom that I will be 'Besharam' all the time as well.
Both the girls were dead serious, Sumit and I were in splits, the literal meaning went too far.

They are only this little.... now

Kids say the darnest things....

This qualifies more as 'mis pronunciations' rather that funny anecdotes and as my final baby is growing up, I want to make sure I track this and embarrass her later as she grows older!

'Lipzoc'... Mummy can you please put strawberries in my lipzoc.

---It is funny as hell, we corrected her once saying its Ziploc and she thought we were making fun of her, so she said 'You don’t know, its 'lipzoc' and not 'Ziploc'

'Valina'... Little Lady says... my favorite flavor is Vallina

--- We know its Vanilla, but I just don’t want to correct her, Vallina ice-creams are just so good, what do I say!

'Ear is broken'...Little lady sadly gets ear aches pretty often and then she says the next mornings 'My ear is broken please be careful around it!'

--- Yes, I can tell her its ear ache, but where is the fun in that, Ear is broken is just so innocent.

Kids grow up way too quickly (cliche but true) and in a few years when I am reading these posts, it will me remind of 'Valina icecreams' and the giggles that surround my house!

Life is too short, enjoy the silliness!

Negotiating with kids

In my next edition of Kids say the darnest things.

I have a 6 year old who is convinced she needs a pet. Since we have a few friends who own cats and dogs, she is not as charmed with them. She decided she wants a Fish.

V:    I think we should have a fish
GN: Hmm, let me think about it
V:    How about a deal? I write every single day and then you get  me a fish
(You see, we are encouragin her to write a bit more)
GN: Hmm, let me think about it.
V:    Ok, today is February 1, how about every single day this month
(She is really not letting it go)
GN: Hmm, let me think about it.
V:    Nothing to think about, its done. Final! Yay, I cant wait to tell me friends I am getting a fish!
(Really!!!! That's it!)

Second case:
V: I think I want a spider or a lizard for a pet.
(This is not going to end well!)
GN: Why?
V:    Because you are scared of them.
GN: But, that's just not fair.
(Oh my gosh!!!)
V:   Ok, when I grow up and have my own house, I will have a spider or lizard pet. And then you have to come every day
(Huh?)
GN: Why will you have your own house?
V: (Eye Roll) Look around you, you, papa, mama, bhua, friends everyone has their own house.
GN: Aah.
V: Done! So a spider as a pet, 10 years from now. You have to visit everyday and sleep in the room where my spider's cage is!
(Again, I loose, she moves out: I still have to visit her daily and sleep in the darn spider's room!!!)

Can I have my toddler V back, Miss Chatter Box? Please?